Don’t Forget Your Filter: A Lesson in Thoughtful Communication

 If you looked around your house, you would notice a ton of "filters". You'll see them in your clothes dryer, in the water purifier in the fridge, in your furnace, your coffee maker, filters in your vehicle, just to name a few.

A filter stops some things from getting through, ideally the harmful particles, the impure ones, those that can damage the end product.

I've been thinking about the need for "filters" in our lives since my mom told me a story of what happened to her this week.

My mom was attending a community concert, something she loves to do and has a season's pass for. Before my dad passed away 3 years ago, they would always go together. Since then, she often goes with a friend.

On this night, she choose to attend alone. Totally normal.

Until the lady she said down next to in the auditorium looked at her and said, "Did you come alone? Don't you have any friends?"

Ugghhh

My first reaction is "What's wrong with people?" My second one is "Why don't people filter their thoughts better?"

But then I have so many examples of me not "filtering" my thoughts, of me speaking without thinking, without passing my ideas through a "filter", so that what came out was appropriate.

I'm confident this uncomfortable interaction with a stranger at a community concert won't derail my mom too much. But it is a lesson to me. Don't forget your filter. Don't do damage to others because you can't pause long enough to filter your thoughts into helpful words.

Love you mom. Don't stop enjoying community concerts based on the un-filtered words of a stranger.